A Mom is Forever

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    Saturday, I was perusing the bargains at JC Penney’s, picking out a deeply discounted cute grey sweater to ward off the cold while waiting for the spring that I know is supposed to arrive any day now.

     While waiting in the long line, which moved incredibly quickly, I admired the clothes on the counter ready to be purchased. They were in pastel colors, the colors that are supposed to look best on me according to my “color chart”. Of course, I never buy the appropriately colored clothes because the deep discount bargain rack is my go-to shopping place, where pristine, professional looking, pastel colored items are rarely hidden. Thus my wardrobe consists of the browns, the blacks and the grays.

     On the cashier’s counter lay two different colors of pants, a light pastel peach and a business-looking tan. The peach colored sweater had three quarter length sleeves and pearl buttons on the neck and down the front. A matching, sophisticated shirt, obviously of wrinkle-free material had a crisp collar and matching pearl buttons on the sleeve. The clothes screamed success and professionalism, and were obviously not from the bargain rack.

     The woman for whom the clothes were being purchased was about my age, with hair dyed a honey blonde and a middle aged waist holding up a pair of jeans. What struck me most was her relationship with the woman standing next to her. The two of them were giggling conspiratorially, pointing at the clothes with a look of accomplishment, arms gently around each other’s waist. The other woman was much older, with similarly colored hair and body frame. They kissed lightly, among their smiles, and as they walked away with the precious bagged items, they seemed to bounce on air. It struck me that it was a daughter and her mother, with the mother buying her daughter some clothes for her work. As old as the first woman was, her mom still wanted to care for her and buy her the perfect clothes. It was probably a special occasion and they had the pleasure of shopping together to purchase the perfect gift, a joyful adventure for both mom and daughter.

     This scene ignited such an emotional flash back for me that I almost cried out. That could have been my mother and me if she was still alive. For my birthday, she would always take me shopping to buy two wonderful outfits that I would not have been able to afford otherwise. They would be in my perfect colors, and we wouldn’t care if they were on sale or not. We would go out to lunch at local restaurant and share a piece of cheesecake for dessert. It would be a special mother/daughter day, where my mom, eventually in a wheelchair as she aged, would still be my mom, maternally caring for my needs, an emotionally bonding experience for both of us.

     My mom passed away a few years ago. My heart is conflicted with joyous memories along with a deep sadness that hurts my heart. I sit here typing this with tears in my eyes, trying not to let them fall. Mother’s Day this year was especially meaningful. Only now, with her permanent etching upon my soul, do I really appreciate the things she did for me. I wish I could tell her I love her one more time…

 

Please consider purchasing my book; The Apple Tree: Raising 5 Kids with Disabilities and Remaining Sane.

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Comments on: "A Mom is Forever" (10)

  1. Thank you for sharing this beautiful post… Today is my mother’s birthday… and I’ve been celebrating her life in my heart all day… (❤️ Irene, 1925-2004)
    Thank you…
    Pat T.

  2. I can really relate to this post at the moment. Although my mum is still with us, and doing well, my dad passed away last year, and my aunt who was like a second mum, (Italian extended family) passed away about a month ago. I too wish I could tell them I loved them one more time.

    >

  3. i wish you could, too. sending you lots of hugs, hang in there. xo

  4. I am always a teensy bit envious of women who had a special relationship with their mothers. Not in a malicious way. I celebrate for them. Just sometimes wish a bit of it had fallen my way. Funny thing is, just this week I have been remembering taking my mom shopping for her outfit when I was getting married. She was VERY upset she had put on weight. She had been such a waif until going into a nursing home (aged 62!) had seen her sitting around being fed constantly and walking nowhere. I was impatient with her then. Just now, at 62, I can understand how devastated she felt.

  5. My mom was always giving me gifts. The evening I saw her in the hospital (she died the following day) she was concerned that my husband and I had not had supper because we had rushed in to be with her. She wanted to give me money for a restaurant meal, but I said “thanks Mom, but we’re just fine. We’ll have something when we get home.” How I wish I had just stayed with her that night! She was such a loving and giving person. Everyone who met her loved her. I can surely understand how much you love and miss your mom. What wonderful examples they were for us! How sad that not all moms and daughters have that relationship! God bless you for sharing your lovely story.

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